Divorce Challenges Family Caregivers
Did you know that about 50% of all marriages in America will end in divorce? This is an astounding figure, especially when you consider the impact of changing family dynamics on caregiving. Consider this: a good friend of mine, in addition to her mother and father, is very close with her step-mother and step-father. She is also very close to three out of her five aunts and uncles, who are also divorced and re-married. Neither of her step-parents have children of their own. Granted, my friend is only in her twenties, but think about years down the road; if three of her four parents fall ill, she and her siblings will have a lot to think about.
And, thus, the new challenges of family caregiving are illustrated. The New Old Age, a New York Times blog about issues related to aging parents, wrote a piece in August about this very topic in August: "It adds another layer of complexity to an already complex and emotional situation," said Suzanne Mintz, president of the National Family Caregivers Association. Now, does this mean that there's no hope for these families? Absolutely not. Here are some things to consider ahead of time to ensure optimal preparedness:
- Consider your role. What role will you play if it is your father versus your step-father who needs care? Will there be a difference in roles?
- Talk to your aging family members. Have a dialogue about what they expect.
- Make a tentative game plan. A lot can change between now and then, but it's always good to play out the possible scenarios with family members.
The U.S. Census Bureau indicates that in 1960, about 4 percent of people over 60 were currently divorced or separated; by 2000, the proportion had climbed to more than 9 percent of men and 10 percent of women. That was almost 10 years ago, and this phenomenon will undoubtedly continue to grow along with divorce rates and the number of people turning 65. Can you think of other considerations for providing elder care to parents, step-parents and other family members? Or perhaps you have a story to share and advice to give - share now!